Wednesday, December 31, 2014

5 Fatal Negotiation Mistakes



Generally, people think of negotiation as a formal process. However, many of our daily conversations could also be considered a form of informal negotiations. Generally, parties will not consider task-oriented conversation negotiation, when, in fact, it often is.

Regardless of whether your negotiation is formal or informal, people have a tendency to make the same mistakes. These mistakes derive from inherent human traits and are generally irrational. They are irrational in that they are not in everyone’s best interests, not that they are emotionally driven. An actor can be emotionally driven and still act in his best interest.

Here are the top five negotiation mistakes that I have encountered over the years that I have been training and consulting in this area.

“Me vs. You” Negotiation
Humans inherently believe that specific wants in negotiations are scarce. They assume that they must fight over the assets, which turns the negotiation into a competition. This competitive negotiation assumes that each side wants to increase their share to the detriment of the opposing side. There is a clear winner and a clear loser. This mentality leads to inefficiencies and harms the parties’ personal and professional relationships.
Some assets are indeed scarce yet the inherent tendency to view every asset through the lens of scarcity, which leads to the 'Me Vs You' – competitive negotiation, prevents negotiators from seeking and creating added value solution.

Negotiating in Bad Faith
Negotiating in good faith is always a good practice. It does not mean that you must meet a theological requirement to negotiate in good faith or that karma requires that you negotiate in good faith. Instead, if you negotiate in bad faith, you will eventually have to leave the situation as you'll find it impossible to live with your own unethical conduct. If you do not want to ruin your negotiation progress, then preserve your own ethical code.

Focusing on One Item
Innate human characteristics are likely to cause negotiations to center around one item—usually money. Negotiating only one issue, which is also called one-dimensional negotiation, is likely to cause dead ends or require that one side compromise far too much. One-dimensional negotiation often indicates that the negotiation is still on a positional-competitive level instead of an interest-cooperative level.

Multi-dimensional negotiation occurs when you increase the number of items on the table. Getting to multi-dimensional negation requires you to ask the Why question: Why does each party want any particular outcome? When utilized properly, this question opens doors to understanding the other party.

Sticking with Your Position (even when flexibility would work better)
If all of your interests, needs, and constraints that you brought to the negotiation are addressed, but they are addressed in a different way than you initially envisioned, does that mean you compromised? Sadly, quite a few of participants in my workshop would answer “yes” to that question. They assume that any change in their initial position is a compromise, even if the end result addressed all of their concerns.

This is a form of one-dimensional negotiation, and it is so deeply rooted in our inherent traits that people assume that being flexible means you are compromising. This is not the case. If you ask the Why question, then that opens doors to creative solutions.

When you cling to your initial point of view, without asking yourself the Why question, you are engaging in mental rigidity. Mental rigidity is self-defeating as it leads to unnecessary compromises and too many dead ends.

Failing to Prepare for the Negotiation
This last point is perhaps the most obvious. Everyone knows the importance of preparation. Yet, I’m still surprised at the people who dive into negotiations as if they are cats crossing the street—acting quickly without looking first. It is no wonder that they often do not make it to the other side.
Practicing your negotiation in your head may seem unreal because there is no one sitting across from you. But, if you properly prepare – negotiating the situation in your head – when you are actually engaging in the 'real' negotiation, it will be for the second time. This extra time is crucial!

The number of mistakes that people make in negotiations is much larger than five, and part of that has to do with the fact that negotiation is an everyday occurrence. However, being aware, being properly trained, and avoiding the above mistakes will drastically improve your negotiation abilities. Better negotiation skills mean better results.


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